How did I not think of this before?

Melissa and I are making a band and we are considering having an open audition soon. So far we have three members.

We are looking for people who:

1. are good at looking like they can play an instrument
2. look good while dressed up in animal costumes (other than squirrel and bee - those are already taken)
3. love dancing up a storm
4. would be willing to participate in a multi-part chicken dance

Serious inquiries only. Only those who we would like to come in for an audition will be notified. Thank you and good luck.